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Redneck Wizard
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Harry Potter, Dungeons and Dragons, and Lord Of The Rings meets Country and Nascar
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Charts
Peak #15
Peak in subgenre #4
Author
Jeff Reuben
Uploaded
June 05, 2009
MP3
MP3 3.2 MB, 128 kbps, 3:26
Story behind the song
Harry Potter, Dungeons and Dragons, and Lord Of The Rings meets Country and Nascar
Lyrics
I don't do Pinot Not the Chardonay type But I can chug a case of beer And play D and D all night In the basement inside my momma's house Or at a NASCAR race tailgate I've got posters on my wall of Gandalf, Dale and Snape Don't call me a hayseed cause I'm no medieval dip I'll cast a spell to make yer buttcheeks swell Till you have to let one rip! Cause I'm a redneck wizard Mullet and my mage hat I'm strictly business on the front side A mystic party in the back And at night my friends and I go dragon tipping on my farm And I can woo my cousin with an invocation charm So if you hitch a trailer to your souped up Phantom Steed You might cast spells from the east boondocks school of sorcery Cure Wounds?! (Cure Ham!) Moet Dom Perignon Now that's some fine wine Oh but I bewitched my milking cow: so that now she makes moonshine! It makes me tipsy As a gypsy Plus I get my buzz for free And then I break out my own magic wand to make my wench want me My sis thinks I'm nerdy She calls me a big dork But she knows I've got her back When she fights goblins and orcs! Cause I'm a redneck wizard In robes and overalls I got a wand rack on my pickup I yell "Abraca-YEEHAW!" Weave enchantments helping Gordon, and curse Kyle Busch to hell And I know all the words to every Harry Potter spell If changing into camo means invisibility You might cast spells from the back-country school of sorcery Charm hick! (Charm hick!) I'm a redneck wizard I ain't no high class bard And I store all my magic potions In a crystal mason jar And I patch my robe with duct tape, start my grill with lightning bursts I'll fill your pond with snakeheads with an evil warlock curse If your broomstick has mudflaps, if your gun is a portkey You might cast spells from the West Virginia school of sorcery Phase Barn! (Phase Barn!) Hold Boob! (Hold Boob!) Kill Road! (Road Kill!) I said "Git er done!"
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