Dir en grey: Gauze (1997)
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Story behind the song
I'm impatient.
A masochist's blood runs in my veins,
and I'm with you, a sadist
If I could,
I want to use the poisonous kiss
Because of grief, virtue can't be seen.
You're the last "MOTHER"
I'll conceal the memory before you find it.
You're the first "MOTHER"
Though a clock goes left to right,
a committed sin will never change
You're the first and the last person
who understands me
You'll be burned into my memory
Seeing me resist,
The strong and gentle, forcing decision
I can never tell you
The sound of my skin grated tortures me.
You'll let the wound fester
Are you, a jealous person, always cold-blooded?
Still now, I don't want to forget
I was an abused kid
Just tell me why I don't have a "MOTHER"
Please find kindness in a holy cradle some day
Because of sorrow, the future can't be seen.
You're the last "MOTHER" for me
At least I'll try to hide it
You're the first "MOTHER"
Though a clock goes left to right,
a committed sin will never change
I destroyed the first and the last person
who understands me
I wonder if you're too kind to me.
Reflecting the past trauma,
I destroyed the last person, you.
Was I sadist?
Lyrics
シビレを切らしてる 僕はマゾの血をひき サドの君を待つ
出来れば 毒のbaiserで
悲嘆故に美徳見えず 君は最後のMOTHERで
記憶埋めて気付かれぬように 最初のMOTHER
時計は左回りでも 犯した罪は変えれず
最初で最後の理解者 焼き付けて
嫌がる僕を見て 強くそして優しく無理矢理の決断
決して君には言えない
皮のキシム音が痛い 傷を深めてゆこう
嫉妬深い君は いつでも冷血なの？
幼い頃の虐待がね 今でも忘れずにいたい
何故MOTHERはいないの 教えてよ
いつかはやさしさに気付いて 聖母なる 「ゆりかご」 の中で
悲痛故に前が見えず 僕の最後のMOTHERで
せめて君に気付かれぬように 最初のMOTHER
時計は左回りでも 犯した罪は変えれず
最初で最後の理解者 壊した
僕には優し過ぎたのかなあ？ 昔のトラウマを映し
最後の君まで壊した僕はサド？
